D-escort blog

I am learning cut throat razor shaving!

And you are going to let me, aren’t you..? How hot will this be? I would dress very very provocatively, groomed to perfection.

Imagine the scene..an old fashioned leather barber chair, steaming hot water, steamy hot towels, foamy brush at the ready.. and a very sharp shiny gleaming open razor..and you are wondering..if..

 I sit you down, swivel the chair around, bend your head back, and take my place behind you, smiling.. you watch me in the mirror, my suspendered and stocking clad thighs disappearing behind the chair, my breasts spilling out and pushing against your shoulder, just sometimes..but YOU.. YOU must.. stay.. STILL.

Be still, or I may cut you… Who’s the Daddy? Yeah me, that’s who! You know about my razor sharp wit, now how about my sharp razor? Haha.

I massage your face  with skin softening oils, and apply the hot towels. Whilst we are waiting..I loosen your clothing, especially the tightning of your trousers..? You can’t see me, anything could be happening. I might smear my glossy red lipstick in the process…

Then after a little rest time, then comes The Hot Foam Shave. You are more relaxed now…

This experience so far,  may just be enough for you, but maybe you would like to stay for further fun after The Hot Foam Shave…but that’s another blog!?

Email me if you like ‘Something for the Weekend Sir?’

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don’t point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?

His job!

Wasn’t it a fantastic speech?

Baccy baby called me and said, ” Dolly, I have been reading your blog, I think you are the best choice for this speech writing malarky, can you, please?”

So I said, ” Well Baccy, I will do my best, as long as it doesn’t interfere with my boys, I have an incall in 2hrs…”

And so it was..I think I did ok, don’t you?

I was a bit worried that I’ve now given him a very difficult job to go on with. I think he will be ok though.

Hehe, I have won a ‘Lifetime Achievement’ award on www.sussexpunting.com

I once won a wicker basket hen (to put eggs in) in a prize bingo at my little brothers school,  in about 1979. I was overjoyed at that too!

Isn’t it great! Thank you to those who voted for me. xxxxxxxx

(Yes, yes, I KNOW that it means ‘Old Boiler’ award, but just let me have my moment ok?)

Do you like my new pic? Many more to come, stay tuned!

Oh, and a new review on TER ! Thank you very much P! xxx

http://www.theeroticreview.com/link/link.asp?ID=102373

Hey Stella, it’s by Aubrey Beardsley, a well known Art Nouveau illustrator..you can look him up now and find lots of naughty drawings like this!

Actually I have 3 new reviews..(tosses hair back, bats eyelashes, and pouts invitingly)

I didn’t discover the other ones immediately, but you can see them on www.sussexpunting.com and www.captain69.co.uk

But I have just seen this one! Having this sort of endorsement is the best advert I can ever have, and I gladly welcome it.

Thank you kind gents!

http://punternet.com/frs/fr_view.php?recnum=87476

1. Whores have the ability to share their most private and sensitive body parts with total strangers.
2. Whores have good senses of humor.
3. Whores challenge sexual mores.
4. Whores are playful.
5. Whores are tough.
6. Whores have careers based on giving pleasure.
7. Whores are creative.
8. Whores are adventurous and dare to live dangerously.
9. Whores teach people how to be better lovers.
10. Whores are multi-cultured and multi-gendered.
11. Whores give excellent advice and help people with their personal problems.
12. Whores have fun.
13. Whores wear exciting clothes.
14. Whores have patience and tolerance for people that other people could never manage to put up with.
15. Whores make lonely people less lonely.
16. Whores are independent.
17. Whores teach people how to have safer sex.
18. Whores are a tradition.
19. Whores are hot and hip.
20. Whores are free spirits.
21. Whores relieve millions of people of unwanted stress and tension.
22. Whores heal.
23. Whores endure in the face of fierce prejudice.
24. Whores make good money.
25. Whores always have a job.
26. Whores are sexy and erotic.
27. Whores have special talents other people just don’t have. Not everyone has what it takes to be a whore.
28. Whores are interesting people with lots of exciting life stories.
29. Whores get laid a lot.
30. Whores help people explore their sexual desires.
31. Whores explore their own sexual desires.
32. Whores are not afraid of sex.
33. Whores hustle.
34. Whores sparkle.
35. Whores are entertaining.
36. Whores have the guts to wear very big wigs.
37. Whores are not ashamed to be naked.
38. Whores help the handicapped.
39. Whores make their own hours.
40. Whores are rebelling against the absurd, patriarchal, sex-negative laws against their profession and are fighting for the legal right to receive financial compensation for their valuable work.
41. DO YOU HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO BE A WHORE?

Thanks to www.anniesprinkle.org

 

Hogmanay? Hug mah boobs, why dontcha?

I hate Xmas and New Year, it’s freezing and everything is shut. And you have to eat stuff that you would never eat at any other time. And taxis are stoopid fees if you can get one. Rarer than hens teeth. And watch films that you have seen 59 times already. OOh, what is it, ‘The Wizard of Oz’? Haven’t see this one. What is it about?

Groundhog Day, yes I know of THAT exp, at least once a year…once a year, once a year..once in my life is too much.

Turkey. What do they mean?  It is a bit rubbish! It’s like a big dehydrated chicken, your throat is gagging for water to swill it over with. And you get bloody cranberry jam with it! Jam+meat=jammy meat. Do you buy turkey at Waitrose every week cos you love it? No, I didn’t think so. So good that you save it for 25th Dec? Hmmm. Yeah, have fun with the jammy meat. Delicious.

‘Eat me’ dates. Oh. I. Can’t. Wait.

This thin wooden oval box (coffin) of serial murderous horror rears it’s ugly head every year, WTF! 

You never eat these ANY OTHER TIME, do you? And I will tell you why..

They taste like shit.  Fact.

Big sticky sugary turd-like things. Vile. Like huge insects mixed with seeping curdling formaldehyde/syrup.

I’d rather have a ‘Meet Me’ date…OK, maybe an ‘Eat Me’ date would be OK…if you know what I mean, hahaha..

 Well.. I bet you thought I was superbly splendid and exciting, and was swinging off of a chandelier at the New Year chimes..

No, I was fast asleep till 12.10. I fell asleep a few hrs before, thee olde grannymopp that I am.

So when is it that you want to ‘meat’  this most delightfully chirpy Dolly then? Hahaha.