D-escort blog

Good news for London!

 www.rhiacharles.co.uk is moving up to London to entertain you! Rhia is an independent escort in her flirty 30′s, blonde, slim with gym toned all natural curves, very lovely and very attractive…and a good pal of mines!

(no, we don’t do duo’s, sorry boys!)

But I can tell you that you’re definitely in for a sexy luscious treat…And I don’t endorse just anyone, you know that…!

She is a sweetie for sure!  Intelligent, articulate, sensual, honest, sexy, honourable, elegant, sensible, witty, warm, and completely charming! …A fine woman indeed. You’ll soon see, if you know what’s good for you!

She does have a good collection of escort reviews on Punternet and TER, if you want more proof…here’s a clue.

 http://www.punternet.com/frs/fr_view.php?recnum=87579 

Rhia Charles will be living in Pimlico SW1, and is moving into her gorgeous new boudoir  in January, so I think, nay, know, that you had better get in the queue NOW, for this very popular and delightful lady.

Read her funny, charming and very informative London escort blog at www.rhiacharles.co.uk/blog .

Welcome to London, Rhia! xxx Dolly (a pretty good safety shoe horn for newbies to London, haha)

I have been indulging my inner ‘lazy cow’.

I’ve often said that I would die without books. Ammend that to , books and cheese. And maybe some TV.

Haha, don’t quote me!

You know,  if we had to fend for ourselves somewhere, and you needed to feed me, then I would be so so happy to be fed good bread, butter and cheese for ever! And tearing the bread, smearing the butter and just biting chunks of cheese inbetween, is the way. That is a ‘Death Row’ meal of choice, is it not!? Fantastic. I’m such a cheap date, haha.

But I would love that, honestly! Tearing at food with your fingers, getting the juices or crumbs all over your face, it’s just..so right sometimes! I could do camping, no lipstick, no hairdrier, try me!

( I will behave, whilst silver serviced though, of course I do know which cutlery to use! And I was a silver service waitress as a student, so I would not embarrass you, I promise! )

Anyways..I have been undulging in eating and lounging like an eaty-loungy thing this past fortnight, (those aren’t real words are they?) but I’m ILL, aren’t I?  I’m think I’m gonna be ‘good to go’ for late Jan…I think…but let’s see.

I finished up the total of 48 episodes of ‘Dexter’. I hated the last episode, it leaves one hanging!

No, that’s not a clue…

Aha! But what do I have here, she says, rubbing her chin and squinting into camera 1…only 1-3 series of ‘Californication’ to investigate?

Oh, it certainly starts with a bang! 

And some vomit.

Twice in one scene.

Yeah.

That’s what I was thinking…

David Duchov-whatsitny is a very good actor, his character here is a wild edged sloppy charming rake, and he gets away with it, but I thought..why is your face a very different colour from ever other actor here? I know you are supposed to be a caddish type, but it just looks  like you’ve washed your face with the contents of a Hoover bag?

It’s not right. It’s wrong. Bad MUA .(make up artist) Wreckless men do lots of stuff, but rubbing Hoover bags on their face is probably not top of the list. Snorting it might be. Maybe that’s why he looks as he does. Hmm.

‘Hank’ is a laissez faire style of writer with ‘some kind’ of writers block,  and his turbulent existence includes lots of casual sex… hot women seem to just fall at his feet (smelly, with hard skin,  I’ll wager) Yes… it is only tv, darlin’… sorry, haha.

He has some great  one liners that will make you hurl though, and it’s definitely worth a watch!  There’s a great scriptwriter on set for sure, ooh, must have links to me, haha.

I understand how and why women fall for cads, but I never have done! Not even one time. Actually, I have been the cad-ess, and I’m not proud of that, looking back. I have been dumped too, but they were nicely done, those dumpings!

Lazy Cow is signing off to watch the next episode!

(‘The Shoulder’ update  –  pencil me in for late Jan as mentioned above)

Can’t wait, but must…huh.

Crawling the walls, licking my lips, a big sigh…xxx Dolly

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gQ7yaQhXJAI

‘The Shoulder’ is still mending, all good so far, my next osteo visit is 6th Jan, so bear with me…but…

Meanwhile…one word that is keeping me entertained is…Dexter!

I know that everyone in the civilised world probably knows of him by now, but as a non tv watcher, I only knew of it, but hadn’t seen. J gave me a cd ages ago…but I only got to see the first episode before falling by the wayside…sorry J…But many thanks for the introduction! xxx

My God, how could I have missed out on this! It’s so bloody (excuse the pun) brilliant! Edge of the seat stuff, and I now have series 1-4  in my clutches! (Thanks M, I’m on series 2 already, did 10 episodes yesterday, the supreme couch potato champ, with no couch!)

How addictively and oddly charming is Dexter?  There be a warning…murderers can be charming and just like a regular guy…no one should ever get complacent about who they meet…take heed, all.

For those of you (must be very few) who don’t know, Dexter is a very astute serial killer ‘vigilante’ but only goes after rotten baddies, and he finds out ‘who is who’ mostly because of his day job as a forensics/blood spatter specialist for Miami Police dept. So, of course he knows how to hide his tracks etc, and literally, get away with murder.  An award-winning dark comedy drama series from the states, and it is fantastic! If you’re like me, too engaged elsewhere, and usually ‘know but miss out on’ anything of note, always the last to know etc, make some time to see ‘Dexter’, it’s absolutely brilliant!

Here’s a weird thing…when I was younger, my mum used to buy loads of  those 70′s ‘True Crime’  USA mags from second hand book stores. The cover pics all had women in bikinis on them, their terrorised faces were the focus… (a whole discussion on it’s own there, genre/period/media etc)

I wasn’t really allowed to read them, but hey, I got my mitts on them when she wasn’t looking. I read loads of them, god awful stuff, really gruesome. I was agog. Still read stuff like that, now. I think I might have learned some stuff that now keeps me safe though, well …maybe. In my other arty life, I do have access to, and do look at real forensic photos too, to recreate realistic scenes. But that’s another story…I’m obviously not squeamish…!

Of course the shoulder thing was completely unexpected,  as I hadn’t even hurt myself in previous days. Last week at this time, I was crying my eyes out, I thought Dollymopp was all over, finished. I was so very upset. I’m quite happy now, 7 days on in recovery.

Feeling a bit better today too, and thanks to everyone who’s sent comments, emails and texts, you’re very much appreciated!

Guess what I found in HMV the other week?

Lots of dvds of ‘Roald Dahl’s Tales of the Unexpected’. Remember that?

I bought the whole lot, as I just loved that as a child.

Roald would always do a cryptic and inviting RP introduction from his dimly lit creepy armchair in a period room setting, and I would be so excited as to what would follow next! It was so popular then, and there are 100′s of episodes now. Fabulous! 

‘Lamb to the Slaughter’ and ‘Royal Jelly’ were the ones that I immediately remembered.

So what a great way to spend a recovery, and I’m having it! I’m not well, so I am allowed to indulge?

I remember staging  a thing we called ‘Guess This Programme’, where my brother and I would act out the visual credits of our favourite progs, and make my mum, dad, and their friends guess what it was.

Fondue and maxi dresses on a Sat night dinner at home, a very Mike Leigh view, akin to ‘Abigail’s Party’/nouveau riche.

What fun! More laughing at, than laughing with, with hindsight!

For ‘Tales’, I would stand on a kitchen chair and twirl around in a circle holding playing cards, whilst singing the theme tune,  my brother would kneel on the floor waving bits of coloured paper around my feet. (he was the flames, you see)

I’m sending you off to be nostalgic, and find favourite tv memories from your younger days…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zzaobXhzX9E

I’m a bit lost as to what to do with myself these days. I suddenly have something… it’s called ‘spare time’, and that wasn’t in my vocabulary before! Some people assume that independent escorts are shopping or lounging around a lot…as if an ‘independent’ escort business, or any one woman/man  business runs itself, yeah right…! Admin, ads/marketing, stat study and prep takes up a lot of our time, as we are doing everything by ourselves. One can rarely delegate, as it’s such a delicate, private and personal ‘thing’ that we choose to do. It never feels like a job or work to me, but an important part of my everyday life  that must be dealt with, and it takes time.

 I’m not physically able for much activity right now of course, but still have stuff online to do. Can still type at least.

Saw osteo again yesterday. He  gave me some acupuncture and massage, but he still won’t move my shoulder much, it’s still far too inflamed yet. Got to go for more ultrasound and more acupuncture on Monday afternoon. The treatment is helping, that’s good news. Painful still, 3/10 ish, but nowhere near the agony of 6 days ago.

A little boon…I have 2 osteos now..and both are very handsome! Lucky me…

Went to doc yesterday, and was seen pretty much straight away when I gave them a letter from osteo! WOW.

The (new to me) doc agreed that my injury was too serious to leave untreated for days, as frozen shoulder could still happen. I suppose I’d cost the NHS more later, then..! I’m paying for private treatment too, and I’ve set aside ££££ for that.

GP, here’s the odd part..he kept laughing at me, and I was annoyed.

I said,  ’What are you laughing at, I’m in real pain here,!’

He says, ‘It’s your way of telling me about it, you’re very funny! What’s your dayjob, are you a comedienne or something?’  (I only told him the artyjob stuff, of course)

I thought, is he being sarcastic and trying to make out that I’m a timewasting hypochondriac? I hardly ever go to the GP, check my records! (I pay for private specialists as well as GUM for other things though, to check me for my/your peace of mind.)

He wasn’t of course, and I had a laugh too, he cheered me up. So I’m pleased that I have now got a nice new GP. Who thinks I’m funny…

So he likes me, and I’ll be alright there in the future, I think.

He laughed when I said, ‘I hope that we never meet again, well, you know what I mean?’

Tonight, in my new found ‘spare time’ , I went to see ‘Avatar’. It’s pretty spectacular! A very important ECO message delivered in a very impressive visual story and style. Takes a lot of reference from the honourable respect of this planet, and certainly from the purity of the ancient tribal existences that came before us. Lovely.

A CGI masterpiece, believe the hype.

Yesterday, (when Bonnie Tyler was on the radio singing ‘I need a hero’… joke) a knight in shining armour appeared for me, out of the blue! Hurrah!

One of the gents who reads my blog called me with a great solution, and I can’t thank him enough! (he wasn’t after that sort of thanks either) He just wanted to help, as he knows how painful my shoulder was. Yes, I said was!

He was known to me through another lady, we have never met for you-know-what, but I knew he could be trusted, so all was fine there. He drove me to the specialist osteopath, and on the way he told me that he has had shoulder pain, and had been given these anti inflamatory pills that really worked, and said ‘I bet the osteopath mentions them too’.

He did!

And with this more indepth osteo examination, the news is, that I can probably be saved from a frozen shoulder, because what I really have is very ‘acute bicipital tendonitis’.  I had no idea that something as small as tendons could cause so much agony.

You just imagine some rest, heat pad or icepack, and some painkillers will fix you in few days, but I was still in agony after 3 ibuprofen, (600 mg in one go!) and it was as if I’d taken nothing.

 If I get ultrasound and physio treatment now, it’s possible that it won’t get to that frozen shoulder stage. Bad news was…the osteo couldn’t give me these pills, and advised that I get to my GP immediately. The osteo gave me some ultrasound, but didn’t move me around so much, he said I was the worst case of inflammation he’d seen. I was crying all the way through it, and in the waiting room too.

Oh dear…trying to get an appt at my GP is like trying to get blood out of a stone…but no worries, because the knight in shining armour had those exact same pills!  I know you shouldn’t take someone elses medication, but seeing as the osteopath recommended the exact pills, I thought I would be ok to have them.

My GP was even shut all day today! FFS…

Have to call them tomorrow, might get an appt in a few weeks. In the meantime, I have enough pills. I have only had 2 today, I had more yesterday. I don’t like taking pills, I go for natural remedies first. But as this was so sudden and acute, I needed a hardcore chemical remedy! Good thing is, they are non addictive, they are not a painkiller, but anti inflammatory, and I won’t need them forever. I hope.

So thanks to this very helpful gent. Thank You Thank You Thank You! If it wasn’t for you, I’d still be crying!

Within 3hrs, the pain had gone from 10/10  to about  3/10! Hurrah for ‘diclofenac’.

It is still painful, but not half the agony it was, and I can even move a bit with no extra pain. I even managed to put on a sweater today. I am going to the osteo again, tomorrow and Monday.

Guess what? At my local GP’s there is a doctor called Dr Doll. Honest, I’ve seen her!

I am still going to be out of action for a long time, sorry… in the meantime, I can still blog and answer mail etc.

MORE pain today, went to see an MA qualified lady at the therapy rooms of Neal’s Yard Remedies, and she confirmed what I’d read online. Recovery could be over a year. YES, really. I just wanted to cry!

I do have enough money to live on if that has to happen, but I pray that it doesn’t. Positive point- I have lots of books to read as yet.

(Weird coincedence, she was the spitting image of an escort named Tinkabelle! I thought..oh my god, is it you? But she didn’t look like she recognised me..but a ‘separated at birth’ moment for sure)

Went for my last dentist visit this eve, so now have amazingly perfect teeth at long last! It’s ‘only’ cost me about £10k, aargh. And about that again, in me having to cancel bookings…!  Oh well. Being fit for me/my boys is more important.

I’m a dreadful dental patient, I’m yelping and squirming all over the chair, I’m awful. On my records I noticed that they had written ‘nervous patient’ on it. It was worse today, because I had just been told that my shoulder condition is serious and near impossible to treat, (most people have to stop work for good) so I was particularly upset.  It was all too much, and I burst into tears in the chair! The dentist thought he’d really hurt me! But it was really all about the shoulder pain. So I told him, and he and the dental nurse were both hugging me and she went to make me tea for later! It’s absolutely throbbing right now, has been for 3 days, it hasn’t let up for a minute. I can’t sleep very well, all I do in the dark silence is concentrate on the intensity of the pain. Painkillers are futile, and I don’t want prescription ones, I fear of becoming addicted to codeine etc. You hear stories! Most people say that even very strong painkillers don’t alleviate the pain of FS anyway.

I’m at the very first stage, the freezing, and this is when the pain is at the most intense. And it is, I tell you. This can last for 2-9 months. Then comes the restriction of movement stage, the frozen, and supposedly the pain lessens a little, but you cannot move your arm at all. GREAT. I kept shaking, shivering and tensing up, she told that my body tissue is in very new shock/trauma from the sudden onset of this. She was really good, talked me through everything that she was doing.  I was a bit more mobile after, but she warned me to not get too gung-ho about that just now.

Later, after the dentist, I met up with Bacchus (boy pal from the escort chat forums) for dinner, and we found a brand new pub opening. Unbeknown to us, the bar and food was free. We didn’t take advantage though, as we are fair and nice! One bottle of wine, sausage and mash for me, fish and chips for B. I was a numb jawed miseryguts of course, and B has just lost his father and had a birthday in the same fortnight. (I’m allowed to say here) But we still had a good time, I love him, he’s a real friend, 4yrs now. We ‘met’ on Punterlink, and then in a real life non punt situation! He’s like my brother. We fight and argue too, but know that by the next day, it’s the past. He’s a very decent, very intelligent chap, and I’m very lucky to have him as my friend. He’s got no designs on me, no agendas.

I can’t bear the thought of Dollymopp no more, could I be a disabled escort? Got myself an appt at www.frozenshoulder.com clinic at 4pm tomorrow. £65 a pop, but I would give ££££’s to be rid of this pain.

Also, much thanks to several gents mailing me with solutions, some borne of personal exp, be it of themselves or of relatives.

Am going to be trying all of those too. The very well regarded equine massage in Somerset is of particular note and interest.

But roll on tomorrow…let’s see.

As well as posting about the unavailable state I’m in, (see post below) I’m lumbering about the Dollymopp boudoir and not in a politely dressed state either, ahem. I’m trying to be warm, but I have been a bit generous on the radiator frontage, and hence, I am only wearing a very small bra and shorts as I post this!  Hmmm, haha.

Anyway, due to dodgy frozen shoulder, getting out of my seat is a somewhat small palaver of sorts, and my boobs keep escaping and falling out of this bra, which is far too small anyway. Caught sight of myself,  and thought, oh where’s the camera! Here’s a photo opportunity if ever there was!

Sat back down to continue etc, and saw that I had a few refs from www.emily-escort.co.uk/wordpress  , she often comes up on my blog stats ref, (thanks Emily!) so I went to have a read. She had posted a pic of her luscious lovely boobs and/in her very small bra! Her cup’s full of runneth over too,  hehe.

What a mad timely coincedence! So I thought hey, I just did a ‘boobs spilling over bra’ photo like that a few mins ago, it’s fate, and I will post it now ! Had just put it in the collection for future ref, you see. On pic, my right boob is the photo arm, higher up! My left arm can barely move…

My boobs aren’t big boobs , but too small bras can be a boob boost sometimes, well.. just for fun pics. I’m sure you will enjoy Emily’s booby pic a lot too!

Sorry, but I am having to take time off AGAIN! I am typing with one hand here…

I had a pain in my shoulder the other day, just a twinge really, and I wasn’t doing anything strenuous, honest.

Anyway, yesterday, I woke up in much more pain and now I have had to cancel my plans. Sorry again, if you’re reading this.

Went to the local therapist today, no appts available though.  I have been told that I have ‘frozen shoulder syndrome’  or ‘adhesive capsulitis’ and it’s really really painful! I have discovered that it’s not easy to get rid of either. But I have found a specialist osteopath in www.frozenshoulder.com though I’m having treatment tomorrow at my local one. Will call the specialist tomorrow too. Just for now, deep heat gel, heat pads and nurofen, but they aren’t doing anything to ease it.  It’s painful even without movement, aching and throbbing , as if it’s broken!

So I’m not going to be much fun for anyone am I? Pah!

I am supposed to be travelling too this week, and I think I will have to cancel all that. Sorry. Will let you know the news later, when I have seen the osteopath.

Well I’m back from my travels! Look what I found… hehe.

Some of the travelling consisted of my gent and I raiding the fabulously massive supermarkets of Germany, Belgium and France, haha. Yes, we know how to live…! I was super impressed by the 6 lanes of cheese in one French market, so impressed that I even took photos! I love cheese, every kind, and thought I was lucky having Borough Market and Neal’s Yard Dairy for my local selection, but the average market over the Channel puts UK to shame.

You might imagine…Gawd, she’s easily pleased…and never seen a Euro supermarket?

Well, no I haven’t! (And it’s a good job too, as I would certainly be the size of a house on the cheese gorging, alone. )

I’m usually ensconsed in luxurious hotels aren’t I? Haha…(I had those too, spoilt me!)

And, it doubles as a ‘zoo-permarket’ too. Haha! Not sure if this is a good idea. Look at those pleading glass eyes.

When I’m in a supermarket, I have sudden interests in taxidermy. Yes. I do. So they cater for that. Thoughtful.

‘Oooh pleasssse don’t buy the foxy burgers Dolly..’ (no there aren’t any!)

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La Maison des Tartes…If this isn’t a great fun name for a brothel, a parlour or an escort agency, I don’t know what is… If anyone uses it now, you’d better give me some credit! (not that kind of credit…)